Though common to everyone, negative emotions are a peculiar aspect of the human experience. Without deep thought or concentration we can become subject to the ride each one decides to take us on -and often when we arrive, it is contrary to our planned destination. An effective goal is to be in control of these feelings so as to increase your conscious decision making power in your everyday life.
Yes, you do get to choose how you feel! Just as in our physical life we are empowered by organization, this process of carefully arranging emotions supports wellness and emotional power. Here is how it is done.
The first rule of the process is to organize your negative feelings into the two bags: home and visiting.
Home emotions are those you generate and execute when you are alone or with family and friends. These emotions may be more intense, frequent and even unpredictable. After all you are as close to restriction-free as you will ever be in life. Often, in at least one of these environments you are safe to make mistakes, grow and be vulnerable without permanent negative, repercussions.
These emotions will also be tied to events in your personal life that make imprints on who you are or become. They deserve quality at home exploration time. The loss of a valued relationship is very rarely easy, but it does not always have to be impassable. At home or with another trusted person, explore the event. Expose your anger, disappointment, confusion, with a view to moving healthily forward.
Then in a calm space positively plan what happens for you next. But deal with the emotions you feel as they are real and precious to your existence. Remember that these are home emotions and home emotions never leave home. They are like furniture. Unless an important person comes to your intimate residence they have no idea of the exact décor.
This brings us to the visiting emotions. They are your safe, public-display, genuine emotions. Controlling these emotions can be easier than those in the home bag. You may share these with strangers, co-workers, and even adversaries. Here, however, they are less intense and often consequence driven.
The dual focus here is honesty and boundaries. It may not be wise to expect to have the same safe outcome you experience with those in your home emotion bag, if you share deep levels of emotions with others you know very little about.
The key is not to carry these emotions with you as you travel to each place. Leave each emotion in its natural environment. There is enough emotion at each venue to keep you occupied. Bringing the home emotion to the visiting venue, or vice versa often ends in more negative emotions to repackage.
0 komentar:
Posting Komentar